Many many eons ago (probably about 18 months) I posted this article about "Confidence" on my then blog. Today I'd like to check-in with an update on what God has been doing in my writing. Hopefully it will encourage you!
"Lately I feel like I’ve been suffering from a lack of confidence. I’m unpublished, but I’ve completed one novel which has since been shelved. (No, I don’t want to talk about it. Except maybe to say that I’m 25 rejections closer to publication now. J) Right now I’m simultaneously writing books 2 and 3, which are completely different, and have different places in the Inspirational market and in my career as I see it playing out.
Wow! In case you haven't heard, I got my first contract last October, with Harlequin's Love Inspired Suspense. Isn't it funny how we have a plan, and God has a plan... *chuckles* I did end up submitting that book 2, which got rejected too!
"While I’m slogging away getting the first draft of both of these down, it’s hitting me that I’m lacking in motivation. Not because I was up half the night with the baby and now I can’t see straight. It’s more of an, ‘If it’s not going to go anywhere, what’s the point in doing it’, crossed with ‘why am I doing this now, and not when my kids are in school?’
Confidence is defined as trusting in yourself and your abilities. I read somewhere it’s a logical assessment of your abilities."
Writing certainly feels like a slog sometimes, doesn't it? There's a word count goal for the week and a chapter outline. And you're knee deep in type type type type and wondering where that first blush of new love for the idea has gone. We start to wonder if it's really worth it.
"For Christians, sometimes we make confidence out to be a dirty word, since we’re all supposed to be meek and humble followers. But you know what? God has confidence in me, so I’m going to have confidence that He hasn't stuck His neck out for me without a reason. He didn't gift me just so he can leave me with nothing.
For me as a writer, this means trusting in what I've learned and the ways I’m putting that knowledge to use. It means doing everything I can, to be the best writer I can be. To make my manuscript the best it can be. Then make the best pitch, to the best agent/editor I can find for the project.
La la la. Happy happy. Published books. Awards. Vacation. ;-)"
Bestsellerdom, an Aston Martin.
Whatever success looks like, I'm still learning to trust God and what He's teaching me. With each new book I'm having to go back and work my way through the baby steps of constructing a complete story. I have to offer it up to Him, because it's my ministry.
"In the meantime, I’m still wading through a mountain of laundry, pictures of princess fairies, my new job at my church bookstore, meltdowns, and dirty diapers but with this in mind:
“…being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.” Phil 1.6 NKJV
God is doing something. And I don’t have to know exactly what it is; I just have to run with it. Key word: run. I’m a firm believer in accelerator to the floor, full speed ahead, living."
Well, there's still a mountain of laundry and the baby still wakes up in the middle of the night (he's 2--can I get an, "Oy" from all you mom's!). But that scripture still rings true. God is faithful and He's working.
Lisa Phillips is a Fliterary contributor. Her website is www.lisaphillipsbks.com and she can usually be found on Twitter @lisaphillipsbks. Her first novel will be published later this year.
A question to all my fellow runners: What keeps you going? How do you run with the assurance that you’ll make it in the end?